God is good! He's provided a wonderful new job! Although I'm grateful for the opportunities that have led me to this point (and for the people God used to give them to me!), I'm very much looking forward to the growth and further open doors that this opportunity provides. This week has started slowly but it has given me a great blessing in downtime to get to know my coworkers. Everyone has been so welcoming and helpful as myself and other recent new hires navigate all that's required in starting our positions. It's also been a very welcome experience as I'm currently working with the HQ team but I will be moving to an off-site location in the next couple of weeks. I'll be working closely and sharing a workspace with another girl who's a little ahead of me in the entrance process. She and I have had some time to get to know each other while she's been at the main office in the afternoons. I feel a bit like I'm getting to know a new college roommate. We've been joking about making our space cozy and inviting with pictures and such. Katie is such a sweetheart. I'm looking forward to spending the workday with her.
Can't wait to see what God does from here!
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
More to Come
It seems I've spent the last few weeks either lacking anything worthwhile to write about or lacking the energy, time or and/or sermon notes (I really dislike mutilating what could otherwise be very useful information with a poor memory!) when I have had something of note to relay. I do have wonderful bits of wisdom from Crusade the last few weeks that I am looking forward to sharing. However,as my pillow is currently beckoning for some quality time before that pesky sun rises again beginning a new set of tasks and busyness, here's my best shot at a very brief update:
God's been working on my heart a good bit lately. His method of choice once again being the complete destruction of "my plans". I seem to remember something about those no longer belonging to me...perhaps I should inform my planner brain....(again!) I have recently transitioned out of my position as Marketing Director (though remaining with the company for now). Through various instances, God revealed His hand in my stepping down. I believe this to be an act of obedience to be able to accept and act upon coming direction from the Lord. Of course, recognizing this to be God's will doesn't make this entirely "easy". I do feel at peace....just not sure why something so crazy is so peace-inducing. I am also planning to move across town in October.
Despite a period of relatively high levels of bitterness and confusion on my part, I am starting to once again see the son through the clouds. This summer has proved to be a hard season of testing. God's been showing me sins and generally areas of my life that are most in need of His correction. Most notably, certain "personality traits" and deeply ingrained sin struggles which, in essence, present themselves as high walls guarding against growing intimacy in my walk with the Lord. As I so easily overlook however, the areas most in need of correction are also most in need of a humbled cry for grace.
As the Young Adults discussed in Sunday School a couple of weeks ago, this walk of faith is made of peaks and valleys.
That said, this is something that came to mind a few days ago. I wrote it down and am posting it in the event that someone may be blessed in knowing that they're not alone.
I find myself feeling like a lost hiker. Worn, wandering in the darkness, often grumbling; striving for some semblance of rest, some plateau in the seemingly ever-inclining journey, wanting nothing more than to collapse and end the stumbling. A far cry from the apparently dormant desire to run hard for the tape- to finish the race. Yet, I notice, however small the steps, however minuscule the progress, I AM still moving! The only certainty being that I do so with a strength not my own.
God's been working on my heart a good bit lately. His method of choice once again being the complete destruction of "my plans". I seem to remember something about those no longer belonging to me...perhaps I should inform my planner brain....(again!) I have recently transitioned out of my position as Marketing Director (though remaining with the company for now). Through various instances, God revealed His hand in my stepping down. I believe this to be an act of obedience to be able to accept and act upon coming direction from the Lord. Of course, recognizing this to be God's will doesn't make this entirely "easy". I do feel at peace....just not sure why something so crazy is so peace-inducing. I am also planning to move across town in October.
Despite a period of relatively high levels of bitterness and confusion on my part, I am starting to once again see the son through the clouds. This summer has proved to be a hard season of testing. God's been showing me sins and generally areas of my life that are most in need of His correction. Most notably, certain "personality traits" and deeply ingrained sin struggles which, in essence, present themselves as high walls guarding against growing intimacy in my walk with the Lord. As I so easily overlook however, the areas most in need of correction are also most in need of a humbled cry for grace.
As the Young Adults discussed in Sunday School a couple of weeks ago, this walk of faith is made of peaks and valleys.
That said, this is something that came to mind a few days ago. I wrote it down and am posting it in the event that someone may be blessed in knowing that they're not alone.
I find myself feeling like a lost hiker. Worn, wandering in the darkness, often grumbling; striving for some semblance of rest, some plateau in the seemingly ever-inclining journey, wanting nothing more than to collapse and end the stumbling. A far cry from the apparently dormant desire to run hard for the tape- to finish the race. Yet, I notice, however small the steps, however minuscule the progress, I AM still moving! The only certainty being that I do so with a strength not my own.
Monday, July 5, 2010
The TaTa Magic
For those who do not know, the SummerLINK team in India is keeping a blog! (SummerLINKIndia.blogspot.com) The team members are taking turns posting so it is even more fun to read the posts and see whose perspective it is. The most recent post contains a fun video of the team in a taxi called the "Tata Magic". The video definitely made my day so be sure to check it out!
http://summerlinkindia.blogspot.com/2010/07/party-mat.html
http://summerlinkindia.blogspot.com/2010/07/party-mat.html
Friday, June 25, 2010
"This Little Light of Mine"
For the visual aspects of Crusade worship last night, the team drew in the theme of flame or light. Backgrounds for the lyrics screen contained images of candles or flames. As the group considered the opposing fruits of broken and unbroken lives from the message, the team presented a creative visual depiction of such a hard-fought truth. All lights in the room were turned off to signal the entrance of five of the students carrying lighted candles. They entered from the back through a center aisle singing: "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, this little light of mine I'm gonna let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine" continually. They arrived at the front of the room to stand in a row before the group. Five voices strong. Another student dressed in all black entered and approached the first student. He stood close behind her and spoke ..... "You're such a hypocrite, slanderer, no one likes you, you should be ashamed....." He continued this barrage while she sang ...growing more quiet with each stinging statement.....until he delivered the final blow: "not even God wants you, give up"! She blew out the candle and stood in silence.
He moved on to the next student: "No one likes you, you're alone in this world!" Another continued attack until she too blew out her candle upon hearing the oppressive demand to "give up". Next was a male student: "you're disgusting, you hide in the shadows with your pornography God cant use you. Give up!" More attacks, another light extinguish, voice silenced. Two girls remain now. He continues. "Slut, whore, trash. You're worthless" With each individual, the cutting blow is delivered: "not even God wants you, give up". One voice, one light remain. She raises her voice in preparation for the attack: "this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine....." He descends: "why are you even trying, why don't you give up"? She persists. He increases his intensity: "No one wants to be friends with you, they wont even talk to you"! She holds steady, still singing, still holding her flame. The darkness makes his final attempt and retreats. She passes her flame to the girl next to her who continues it down the line, lighting the chain and once again filling the room with five voices. Light and praise return, no sign of the darkness. The group exits and another girl from the group approaches the mic to read to us from Rom 8. There is "now no condemnation for those who are in Christ". Praise God! She concluded with, "I hope you feel that freedom tonight" ....
He moved on to the next student: "No one likes you, you're alone in this world!" Another continued attack until she too blew out her candle upon hearing the oppressive demand to "give up". Next was a male student: "you're disgusting, you hide in the shadows with your pornography God cant use you. Give up!" More attacks, another light extinguish, voice silenced. Two girls remain now. He continues. "Slut, whore, trash. You're worthless" With each individual, the cutting blow is delivered: "not even God wants you, give up". One voice, one light remain. She raises her voice in preparation for the attack: "this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine....." He descends: "why are you even trying, why don't you give up"? She persists. He increases his intensity: "No one wants to be friends with you, they wont even talk to you"! She holds steady, still singing, still holding her flame. The darkness makes his final attempt and retreats. She passes her flame to the girl next to her who continues it down the line, lighting the chain and once again filling the room with five voices. Light and praise return, no sign of the darkness. The group exits and another girl from the group approaches the mic to read to us from Rom 8. There is "now no condemnation for those who are in Christ". Praise God! She concluded with, "I hope you feel that freedom tonight" ....
Brokenness
Very much like SummerLINK, the Charleston Crusade project group takes part in corporate worship and hearing from the word as well as fellowship during their weekly meeting (Cru). Also like SummerLINK, they are encouraged to invite guests! I'm so thankful to have been extended an invitation to the last two Crusade meetings.
God's use of timing in ministering to my heart is not only in giving me a group of believers to worship and fellowship with especially in the absence of my small group (in recess for the summer) but also in the timing of my day to prepare my heart for what He wanted me to hear tonight.
During my quiet time today, I felt the need to spend a little more time journaling as God was dealing with my heart on some things. I didn't think much of it until the very same message the Lord was personally preaching to my heart was given again in the meeting! The message was a "special delivery" of grace as it was both very convicting and incredibly freeing!
The evening started out with the testimony of one of the project members, Kim. She began by stating that she wanted to tell us a story about how she fell in love with Jesus. The way she presented herself was so free of any trace of self-centeredness....She's very clearly full of wisdom gained through valleys and trails. I related to her background: Christian home, Christian school, decision at a young age and yet no consistency walking in the faith until college particularly after the breakup of a long-term relationship. A couple of Kim's statements particularly stuck out to me: After realizing that she had not fully submitted her relationship to the Lord, she told Him she didn't have the strength to walk away so she asked God to "either work through the relationship or end it". Such wisdom and beauty in surrender. And such truth. A relationship that is not fulfilling God's purposes is not worth fighting (against God) for. Kim's walk has been getting stronger by the day as she falls "more in love with Him daily". She continues to pray for "a love and passion for Christ that is consistent through ups and downs rather than being dependent on them". This reminded me of a conversation I had with a sweet friend just a few days ago: a needed reminder to seek God to know His character and His heart for His world, His people and His glory not solely for the answer to or delivery from circumstances.
The staff director, Chad, gave the message from the Word continuing the group's study of Romans. Tonight's lesson focused on brokenness from Romans 6 but referencing Romans 5-8.
Chad asked two questions:
1) Does the message of salvation-by-grace-alone lead you to stay unchanged morally?
2) Does the gospel (the message you are no longer "under the law") leave you free to live in any way you choose?
The answer to both is "no"
1) Rom 6:2-14 2) Rom 6:16-23, 7:1-6
and gave "the Faith Formula"
Intimacy w God= (Prayer + God's Word) + Brokenness + (Obedience +Evangelism)
(Faith+Benefits) = (Knowledge of Faith) + Receptiveness + (Acts or Steps of Faith)
Benefits of faith are defined as Fruits of the Spirit
The portion that brought about the most reflection though was the very specific contrasting of Unbroken and Broken People
Unbroken People vs Broken People
unbroken: Focus on the failures of others
broken: Overwhelmed with sense of own spiritual need
unbroken: Self-righteous; have a critical, fault-finding spirit
broken:Compassionate; forgiving; look for best in others
unbroken: Look down on others
broken:Esteem others better than self
unbroken: Independent/self-sufficient spirit
broken:Dependent spirit/recognize need for others
unbroken: Maintain control; must be their way broken:Surrender Control
unbroken: Have to prove that they are right; Claim rights
broken:Willing to yield the right to be right; Yield rights
unbroken: Demanding spirit broken: Giving spirit
unbroken: Self-protective of time, rights, reputation broken: Self-denying
unbroken: Work to maintain image/protect reputation broken: Die to own reputation
unbroken: Desire: to be served, be a success, self-advancement
broken: Motivated to serve others, desire to make others a success and promote them
unbroken: Driven to be recognized/appreciated "The ministry is privileged to have me"
broken:Sense of unworthiness; thrilled to be used at all
"I dont deserve to serve in this ministry"
unbroken: Think of what they can do for God broken: Know they have nothing to offer God
unbroken: Feel confident in how much they know
broken: Humbled by how much they have to learn
unbroken: Defensive when criticized broken: Receive criticism with a humble, open heart
unbroken: Don't think that they have anything to repent of
broken:Continual heart attitude of repentance
Bits of wisdom:
The more I can be broken before God each day, the more I can fall in love with Him
Faith doesn't accumulate, it must be renewed each day.
God's use of timing in ministering to my heart is not only in giving me a group of believers to worship and fellowship with especially in the absence of my small group (in recess for the summer) but also in the timing of my day to prepare my heart for what He wanted me to hear tonight.
During my quiet time today, I felt the need to spend a little more time journaling as God was dealing with my heart on some things. I didn't think much of it until the very same message the Lord was personally preaching to my heart was given again in the meeting! The message was a "special delivery" of grace as it was both very convicting and incredibly freeing!
The evening started out with the testimony of one of the project members, Kim. She began by stating that she wanted to tell us a story about how she fell in love with Jesus. The way she presented herself was so free of any trace of self-centeredness....She's very clearly full of wisdom gained through valleys and trails. I related to her background: Christian home, Christian school, decision at a young age and yet no consistency walking in the faith until college particularly after the breakup of a long-term relationship. A couple of Kim's statements particularly stuck out to me: After realizing that she had not fully submitted her relationship to the Lord, she told Him she didn't have the strength to walk away so she asked God to "either work through the relationship or end it". Such wisdom and beauty in surrender. And such truth. A relationship that is not fulfilling God's purposes is not worth fighting (against God) for. Kim's walk has been getting stronger by the day as she falls "more in love with Him daily". She continues to pray for "a love and passion for Christ that is consistent through ups and downs rather than being dependent on them". This reminded me of a conversation I had with a sweet friend just a few days ago: a needed reminder to seek God to know His character and His heart for His world, His people and His glory not solely for the answer to or delivery from circumstances.
The staff director, Chad, gave the message from the Word continuing the group's study of Romans. Tonight's lesson focused on brokenness from Romans 6 but referencing Romans 5-8.
Chad asked two questions:
1) Does the message of salvation-by-grace-alone lead you to stay unchanged morally?
2) Does the gospel (the message you are no longer "under the law") leave you free to live in any way you choose?
The answer to both is "no"
1) Rom 6:2-14 2) Rom 6:16-23, 7:1-6
and gave "the Faith Formula"
Intimacy w God= (Prayer + God's Word) + Brokenness + (Obedience +Evangelism)
(Faith+Benefits) = (Knowledge of Faith) + Receptiveness + (Acts or Steps of Faith)
Benefits of faith are defined as Fruits of the Spirit
The portion that brought about the most reflection though was the very specific contrasting of Unbroken and Broken People
Unbroken People vs Broken People
unbroken: Focus on the failures of others
broken: Overwhelmed with sense of own spiritual need
unbroken: Self-righteous; have a critical, fault-finding spirit
broken:Compassionate; forgiving; look for best in others
unbroken: Look down on others
broken:Esteem others better than self
unbroken: Independent/self-sufficient spirit
broken:Dependent spirit/recognize need for others
unbroken: Maintain control; must be their way broken:Surrender Control
unbroken: Have to prove that they are right; Claim rights
broken:Willing to yield the right to be right; Yield rights
unbroken: Demanding spirit broken: Giving spirit
unbroken: Self-protective of time, rights, reputation broken: Self-denying
unbroken: Work to maintain image/protect reputation broken: Die to own reputation
unbroken: Desire: to be served, be a success, self-advancement
broken: Motivated to serve others, desire to make others a success and promote them
unbroken: Driven to be recognized/appreciated "The ministry is privileged to have me"
broken:Sense of unworthiness; thrilled to be used at all
"I dont deserve to serve in this ministry"
unbroken: Think of what they can do for God broken: Know they have nothing to offer God
unbroken: Feel confident in how much they know
broken: Humbled by how much they have to learn
unbroken: Defensive when criticized broken: Receive criticism with a humble, open heart
unbroken: Don't think that they have anything to repent of
broken:Continual heart attitude of repentance
Bits of wisdom:
The more I can be broken before God each day, the more I can fall in love with Him
Faith doesn't accumulate, it must be renewed each day.
God's timing....
Although I've experienced it so many times, God's perfect timing never ceases to amaze me. Displaying His unfailing love, He provides for needs of my heart that I'm not always aware of . This particular blessing comes in the form of fellowship with two new coworkers.
Two of the new summer employees, Amy and Erin, are in town for a 10-week Campus Crusade Summer Project. When I heard that they were on project, we started comparing notes....
The similarities have been fun to find and chat about: both are 10 weeks with the staff departing half way through, their project is a first for CCC: first time being held in Charleston! SummerLINK was the first project Crosspoint Church had ever held. Although the summer project I attended was not organized through Crusade, it was modeled after Crusade projects as our Staff Director is a former CCC staffer. We've had fun chatting about Women's Night, offering suggestions for reflection night and generally sharing our experiences.
It's hard to believe its been two years since I was on project. God used that summer and continues to use the people He put in my life in some amazing ways. I now get the blessing of watching two sweet sisters run hard after the Lord as they serve this city on their own project! Their passion for Jesus and their mission here is so uplifting!
The Charleston group is currently preparing for their staff to leave next week. One of the girls has expressed that they're a bit nervous but excited to find out what God has planned for just the students. I told her the night the staff left was one of the sweetest for me on project. The vast majority (I think we were only missing 3 or 4) of the students gathered in one of the condos and watched a movie together. So simple.... and yet such a sweet memory!
SummerLINK ('08 and those currently in progress) has been on my heart recently. God is using this program in hearts and lives throughout the state and now the world! Just two years later, there are FOUR SummerLINKS: the "flagship" of sorts has moved from Hilton Head to Myrtle Beach for its third summer, SummerLINK Clemson is in its second summer, and this year brings the addition of SummerLINK Greenville (serving with Renewal, the church plant of Crosspoint's former Youth Pastor) and the first international 'LINK to India!! Praise God His ways are so grace-laden! He chooses to use us allowing us to take part in His beautiful master plan. What a privilege!
Two of the new summer employees, Amy and Erin, are in town for a 10-week Campus Crusade Summer Project. When I heard that they were on project, we started comparing notes....
The similarities have been fun to find and chat about: both are 10 weeks with the staff departing half way through, their project is a first for CCC: first time being held in Charleston! SummerLINK was the first project Crosspoint Church had ever held. Although the summer project I attended was not organized through Crusade, it was modeled after Crusade projects as our Staff Director is a former CCC staffer. We've had fun chatting about Women's Night, offering suggestions for reflection night and generally sharing our experiences.
It's hard to believe its been two years since I was on project. God used that summer and continues to use the people He put in my life in some amazing ways. I now get the blessing of watching two sweet sisters run hard after the Lord as they serve this city on their own project! Their passion for Jesus and their mission here is so uplifting!
The Charleston group is currently preparing for their staff to leave next week. One of the girls has expressed that they're a bit nervous but excited to find out what God has planned for just the students. I told her the night the staff left was one of the sweetest for me on project. The vast majority (I think we were only missing 3 or 4) of the students gathered in one of the condos and watched a movie together. So simple.... and yet such a sweet memory!
SummerLINK ('08 and those currently in progress) has been on my heart recently. God is using this program in hearts and lives throughout the state and now the world! Just two years later, there are FOUR SummerLINKS: the "flagship" of sorts has moved from Hilton Head to Myrtle Beach for its third summer, SummerLINK Clemson is in its second summer, and this year brings the addition of SummerLINK Greenville (serving with Renewal, the church plant of Crosspoint's former Youth Pastor) and the first international 'LINK to India!! Praise God His ways are so grace-laden! He chooses to use us allowing us to take part in His beautiful master plan. What a privilege!
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Daybreak
My Dad surprised me last week with an opportunity to use some expiring flier miles to come for a visit over Memorial Day weekend. Of course I accepted and found myself heading to Norfolk less than a week later!
One of the main reasons Mom and Dad wanted to invite me home was that my grandmother was in town for an extended visit. My grandmother's sister and her daughter and granddaughter live within a few hours drive of my parents house so they were also there for a couple of days. I wish we'd gotten a picture! We had the two sisters (grandmothers) and their daughters and granddaughters. It was definitely a fun experience to see a piece of my family tree gathered in one place.
I got to town in the early afternoon on Saturday. The ladies were doing some shopping so Dad picked me up and took me to PF Chang's for lunch. It's one of my favorite places to eat but I don't get to go often because the closest to where I live is about three hours away. Definitely a special treat! The group spent the rest of the day exploring some of Va Beach and generally enjoying one another's company. On Sunday, my great aunt and her family had to head back home. It was such a quick visit with them but I was also thankful for some time with just my parents and grandmother whom I don't see often as she's from Michigan. It was so nice to rest and just be together.
To top off the trip, I was able to visit with my Dad's parents on Sunday evening before getting to bed for an early flight on Monday. One of the highlights of the trip though, was the trip back. I had a 6am flight so the sun as just beginning to wake the sky. There was a soft, misty cloud blanket over land mass which was also intertwined with rivers and other bodies of water. It was a beautiful view from the plane! Thankfully, I had my camera in my carry-on!
I was reminded of how small I am in comparison to God's greatness. It was a very comforting, peaceful feeling that the God who created this vast beauty is taking care of me in every aspect of my existence: every heartbeat, every burden. He's in control. Seeing something like this very quickly puts challenges into perspective. God puts on this display of His power, vastness and creativity every morning across the world... What makes me think I need to "help" Him handle the daily "bumps in the road"?
One of the main reasons Mom and Dad wanted to invite me home was that my grandmother was in town for an extended visit. My grandmother's sister and her daughter and granddaughter live within a few hours drive of my parents house so they were also there for a couple of days. I wish we'd gotten a picture! We had the two sisters (grandmothers) and their daughters and granddaughters. It was definitely a fun experience to see a piece of my family tree gathered in one place.
I got to town in the early afternoon on Saturday. The ladies were doing some shopping so Dad picked me up and took me to PF Chang's for lunch. It's one of my favorite places to eat but I don't get to go often because the closest to where I live is about three hours away. Definitely a special treat! The group spent the rest of the day exploring some of Va Beach and generally enjoying one another's company. On Sunday, my great aunt and her family had to head back home. It was such a quick visit with them but I was also thankful for some time with just my parents and grandmother whom I don't see often as she's from Michigan. It was so nice to rest and just be together.
To top off the trip, I was able to visit with my Dad's parents on Sunday evening before getting to bed for an early flight on Monday. One of the highlights of the trip though, was the trip back. I had a 6am flight so the sun as just beginning to wake the sky. There was a soft, misty cloud blanket over land mass which was also intertwined with rivers and other bodies of water. It was a beautiful view from the plane! Thankfully, I had my camera in my carry-on!
I was reminded of how small I am in comparison to God's greatness. It was a very comforting, peaceful feeling that the God who created this vast beauty is taking care of me in every aspect of my existence: every heartbeat, every burden. He's in control. Seeing something like this very quickly puts challenges into perspective. God puts on this display of His power, vastness and creativity every morning across the world... What makes me think I need to "help" Him handle the daily "bumps in the road"?
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